When I was a little girl, I used to take the calendar in my hands and flip through all the crisp, clean pages and wonder what the future held for all those blank squares that represented the days of another year. A new year. If I had known, I would have run to the nearest store for a journal and kept a pristine record of those moments....or maybe not, since I never managed to follow through with journal-keeping, even with the best of intentions. Nonetheless, I deeply regret it.
Those years were full and beautiful and crazy and devastating and exciting. My mundane life changed forever the year I turned 14 and as I whirled and twirled my way to 27, I encountered a life I could never have imagined. Sometimes things I would never have dared to imagine...other things I wouldn't have wanted to imagine. I've seen dreams become reality and reality sometimes become more than I could bear.
Life has been beautiful. Even in the midst of pain.
The coming year intimidates me a more than any other. I'm a little excited. But mostly scared. I'm not used to fearing change. It's all new. But I'm learning that it's when I'm fearful that I am forced to depend wholly on a strength that is not my own.
So...here's to a year of loving God more, learning to trust Him, embracing the changes, developing greater discipline while working towards my goals and never ceasing to learn. Welcome 2012.
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